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Dadchelor party: baby showers become masculine

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Baby showers used to be seen as a women’s affair, but not anymore (Photo: Courtesy)

There is no greater joy or privilege than bringing a new baby into the world. However, expecting a new baby comes with its share of excitement, it also brings with it feelings of fear and perhaps inadequacy, especially as the pregnancy moves towards its final round.

Baby showers are the perfect event not only to celebrate the future mother, but also to help allay some natural fears.

This is where the mother-to-be is beautifully adorned and showered with gifts for her and her baby.

Plus, it’s here that those before her give advice to help her navigate her new journey, whether she’s a first-time mother or not.

As a result, discussions abound about the intimate details of childbirth and postnatal care. However, it is not only about advice, but also a time when friends also play games around babies.

In the past, men generally didn’t go to the showers. They have historically played a minimal role in preparing for and attending baby showers.

The main task of the future father was to ensure that he delivered the mother of his unborn child to the premises and that she was surprised when he arrived.

Then he would quickly depart towards sunset like a possessed man, never to be seen or heard that day. Men were kept at a distance even when it came to preparing for the baby shower.

So much so that it was a family member or a friend of the mother-to-be who usually planned the event and was in charge of creating the guest list and then sending out the invitations; and furthermore would do everything from suggesting the color scheme, food choices and games that would be played on said day.

So, as you can imagine, the baby showers consisted mostly of the mother-to-be and her female family members, friends, and co-workers.

However, over the past four years or so, a strange or new trend depending on how one chooses to look at it has started to take hold in the world of baby showers.

You’d think no man would want to be around baby showers where estrogen-boosted “chores” or “fairgrounds” abound, but that’s no longer the case because the silent but widespread rule that men don’t should not be found near a baby shower was thrown out the window and replaced by what are now known as ‘mixed baby showers’.

As if that weren’t enough, in the western world, men are now going a step further and hosting what are known as “diaper parties” or “dad parties”, where the man invites his male friends and they watch sports and guests. are required to bring diapers. It’s hardly a taboo for men to attend baby showers anymore.

This mixed baby shower trend is prevalent even among celebrities. Look at celebrity baby showers like Milly and Kabi WaJesus, where Kabi planned the surprise baby shower for his wife, and he not only attended it with his male friends, but also organized it in such a way that everything – from games at baby showers – included the men in attendance.

Additionally, celebrities like Blessing Lungaho and Jackie Matubia, Tanasha Donna and Diamond Platnumz, and Nimo Gachuiri and Mr Seed have hosted co-ed baby showers.

This business of co-ed baby showers can be confusing, especially if you’re old school and think everything about the baby, except maybe financial contributions, should be left to the mother.

Nevertheless, those of the new school of thought seem to believe that modern man is more involved in raising a child than his father and ancestors, and attending the baby shower is a metaphorical representation of the father’s more active role. today in the life of her child.

Indeed, many men today take a more direct role in the child-rearing process, and as attitudes towards parenthood have evolved to include a more active role for fathers, baby showers have evolved to include also the fathers in the celebration.

Milly WaJesus thinks co-ed baby showers are a wonderful development as they allow men to be present and participate in the process of celebrating an expected new birth.

“There is nothing wrong or even strange with men attending the baby shower. A co-ed baby shower allows both parents to be celebrated and celebrate the process of being blessed with a Also, fathers today are more involved in raising their child or children and therefore want to be a part of the baby shower as well,” she says.

“My husband planned my surprise baby shower earlier this year, and it was organized so that the men who attended were comfortable and able to participate, as well as enjoy the event. Plus, we not only did a baby shower, but we combined it with a gender reveal.

Agreeing with Milly WaJesus, Yelsea Anganga, who runs Glamor Party Planner, an event company, says co-ed baby showers are now commonplace for customers who want a baby shower where the expectant father and his friends can also play an active role.

“In 2022, baby showers are no longer women-only events; people are doing what are now called co-ed baby showers. Although we have customers who are still traditional in that men are not allowed to participate in the baby shower, we have customers who are specific in including men in the festivities,” says Anganga.

Moreover, Anganga says that today’s men not only attend baby showers, but it has become common for new fathers to have another celebratory event after the baby is born.

“Our clients sometimes ask us to organize post-baby showers. These are events where they celebrate the successful delivery of a healthy baby. Other times the party is all about celebrating events like the first boy in the family. These post-baby shower parties take place after a baby is born and during these events men actively participate.

It should be noted that the increased participation of men in baby showers has changed the traditional format of baby showers, which was originally focused on the needs of women.

Edith Samree, of Bouncy House Baby Shower Events, explains that with the new trend of co-ed baby showers, event planners are tasked with creating an environment and ambiance that will comfortably suit the tastes and needs of women and girls. men present.

“Fathers are now attending baby showers, and even male friends and family members are going to baby showers to enjoy the party. If you invite men to a baby shower, you should know that they may feel bad comfortable engaging in intimate conversations about pregnancy and childbirth, as is standard practice, so you need to change things up a bit, for example, men may be allowed to bring drinks and have their corner or their space and the ladies present can also be allowed to have their corner,” says Edith.

“One way to include men at baby showers is to incorporate foods they enjoy into the menu. Also, when it comes to games, men may not be comfortable play traditional baby shower games. Therefore, the organizer must find baby shower games that they can be interested in. For example, men can play the game where they are tasked to imitate their women by using balloons to create balloon bellies.

Whatever your personal opinion of men who attend baby showers, it’s fair to recognize that although men are physically unable to carry a baby in their body, they are often close by and experience all the side effects of pregnancy. through their association with the pregnant woman. mother.

They are the ones who have to deal with the mood swings of pregnancy and head to the supermarket at 3am when their wife craves a glass of Fanta.

They are the ones who turn into a masseuse when their wife’s feet swell and even stay up late in case of insomnia. The list goes on and on about all the chivalrous actions expectant fathers take to make life easier for the woman who is carrying their child.

Therefore, isn’t it entirely appropriate that men who are comfortable and wish to actively participate in baby showers should be allowed to do so in peace, and for those who prefer not to participate, that they are allowed to do so as well?